life

I remember when I was younger. You know I would always think to myself how could people hurt so bad and be so sad that they would harm themselves to the point of death. It confused me so much, I mean wasn’t everybody happy. What could have brought so much pain? What could make someone so sad? Aren’t you supposed to fear death and not be the one who caused it?

But then I grew up.

I understood how people could hurt so bad and be so sad that they would harm themselves to the point of death. I realized how happiness is so simple to fake. I know what brought all the pain and sadness. Worst, I didn’t fear death, I feared living. This world has corrupted me, it completely made me lose who I am.

Now I haven’t been the same girl I was for years now, that girl is long gone now. She just isn’t me anymore. The girl I am, you don’t want to be friends with me. I know eventually I’ll leave and I don’t want to hurt anybody. Nobody  needs to feel how I do, and I try to protect as many people as I can.

Truth is, the mask I wear on my face has become a part of me. This mask, has become me. So I wouldn’t say I’m fake, I would say this is who I am now. This is who I’ve grown to be. And if people can’t accept that, then it’s okay because I’m not asking for their approval.