Processed with VSCO with m5 preset

Processed with VSCO with m5 preset

What am I supposed to do when my mind and my heart say completely different things? Everyone says listen to your heart, but when I have it’s only left me broken.
And when I listen to my mind, I’m protected and no one can hurt me.
But it’s so much more complicated than this.
Because I can’t express how painful and self-destructing it can be when these two things disagree with one another.
Because then you don’t know what to think and you become overwhelmed.
So overwhelmed that you just break down.
You slowly destroy yourself.
Hating yourself because you can’t understand yourself.
You do anything and everything to make yourself feel stupid.
To hurt and tear yourself apart.
Kinda what I’m doing.
By myself.
Because everyone I want to talk to are always busy.
So I have to do this by myself.
But I always have to.