image2There’s always a next time right? Well that’s what I always thought.

But you always took him away from me.

Every single time.

You ask me why I never give up. Trust me, if he meant absolutely nothing to me I would. It would be so easy too.

But he means absolutely 100% everything to me. I can’t live without him.

But that doesn’t stop you from keeping him away from me.

You are keeping me away from the one thing that makes me happy. The one thing that keeps me going. The one thing that prevents me from being 10 feet under the ground.

So if your helping anyone, who are you helping? It’s not me. It’s not him. Is it yourself?

It’s not pathetic for me to love him. What’s pathetic is that he was there for me when nobody else was and that’s including you. Out of everyone, you should’ve always been there. But nope. To my luck, he came to my rescue.

He was my super hero who wore snapbacks and who had a penny board. Sure he wasn’t everyone else’s ideal hero but he sure was mine. He saved me, he’s my life savior. And I’m not just saying that.

He’s the only thing I hold onto. I stay because of him.

But apparently nothing I can do will convince you to let me and him see each other.

So do me a favor, just forget everything I’ve told you about him and how I feel for him. Because the fact that you know and don’t care, drives me insane. It makes me feel like you are one step closer to knowing me, and I don’t like that.

I want him to be the one who truly knows me.

Because he deserves that.

And I deserve him…..